Ramblings Of A Man Named Joseph Carro

Posts tagged “Depression

Defeating the Darkness

Posted on November 13, 2018

Whenever I get too down on myself, it’s mostly because I’ve become too caught up in my everyday life. Work, bills, laundry, taxes, dishes, etc. No matter what I do to try to remedy the “everyday blues” – it can be hard to pull myself from the oppressive black hole of the mundane. At that point, I try to take stock of my surroundings. I remember that ultimately it’s the things I choose to do, the things I’ve been courageous enough to try, the things I partake in to set off the constant edge I feel. Those things are all more important to me in the long run than the momentary stresses and anxiety of the day-to-day. I’m no musician, but I’ve spent a…

Anxiety

Posted on November 11, 2018

Anxiety is a fickle thing, and it lies dormant within your brain, your soul, until you least expect it. It often rears its head at the most inopportune and vulnerable moments and leaves you scared it will happen again. I have wrestled a lot with anxiety in my life, and it stems from multiple events – and the symptoms are triggered when my body is attacked by lots of different stress all at once or over a long period of time. The first time I had a “real” panic attack, I was sitting on the couch at home by myself. My wife at the time had just gone to work, and I was eating re-heated stuffed shells that her mother had made for us…

The Silver Lining

Posted on August 22, 2018

Some have called me a ghost in the past. The way I walk about Portland, often when nobody else is around, reveling in the quiet streets and the old buildings. I certainly feel like a ghost at times. I moved down Congress Street, wearing a new coat and my leather gloves. The night was cold, but thankfully not as cold as it had been the last couple nights. But it was still cold. I was walking to meet some friends at a bar. As I neared a lingerie boutique called Etain, I noticed a man sitting sprawled out on the sidewalk next to it. His legs were splayed, and he just sat there, looking defeated, his head bowed in silence. I walked past him…

THE WRITE LIFE: Chloe Viner Collins

Posted on April 4, 2018

It’s often said that being a writer is one of the loneliest professions. Be that as it may, I have acquired over time a bevy of friends who not only dabble in writing, but who make it their work and passion. I began this blog to showcase my own writing talents, but also to lift up my writing colleagues and learn from their own work. Writing can be a social act, and I have the friends to prove it. It is my distinct pleasure to introduce you to Chloe Viner Collins. Chloe is a poet from rural Vermont, where she lives in a log home with her husband, their two rescue dogs, cat, and a flock of hens. She graduated Vermont Law School in…

The Kittens.

Posted on March 23, 2018

I was ten years old, and we were living in a run-down apartment building on River Street in Lewiston, Maine. The place was crawling with roaches. It stunk of piss and old beer and cigarettes, but for the first time in my life – I had my own apartment. Technically, it belonged to my mom – but for some reason, we had a deal on the two apartments on the top floor and my brother Gary and I slept in one all by ourselves, while my mom had the other one with my sister Monika, and our youngest brother, Chad. It was an odd arrangement, and sometimes we took advantage of the privacy and brought back things we stole from convenience stores. We were…

The Genesis Of An Idea

Posted on February 27, 2016

I was thinking today about how often, as a writer, I get an idea for something to write about. Sometimes, when I see a photo online, that’s enough to get me writing. I recently wrote about a Lady In Red and it was partly inspired by a photo of a woman sitting at the bar, and partly by my own experiences sitting in bars lately. Sometimes, I’ll be engaged in conversation with someone and I’ll just latch on to a particular part of a joke someone said, or a certain line, or a mannerism and I’ll go from there. Also sometimes I find inspiration enough just being in a particular place at a particular time. In any case, I usually end up reverting to…

Mental Illness

Posted on October 14, 2015

Mental Illness is not something to be trifled with. It’s often silent, it afflicts more of us than we all think, and it comes in all shapes and sizes. Mental illness is the elephant in the room which nobody wants to talk about and it’s one goddamned big elephant, too. I’m no expert in psychology or mental illness – so let me put that right out there. However, I am definitely not a stranger to the ways in which mental illness can negatively impact family, relationships, work, etc – because I have experienced many different forms of it over the years and have been subject to psychoanalysis and treatment, including a brief stint in the “crazy ward” of a hospital. While I am not…